Aging...

Why is it that men seem to age gracefully?  As they age they become sexy with peppered gray hair and they seem aluring and women well gravity sets in and wierd hair starts to grow on your chin?  I mean hypothetically of course (the hair)! Its like some sort of cruel joke not to mention that we experience our sexual peak in our late thirties just about the time that our over 30 bodies start to show us that we are definatley not 20 something anymore and 40 something is closer than we hope.  

I have recently had this conversation with some friends and we did a survey (ok it include about 3 people so the stats aren't exactly robust) and it seems like women in our 30s - 40s who haven't had kids are experiencing all kinds of weird hormonal things like chin hairs and extra lovely painful cramps.  It this because we are consuming mass quantities of caffeine intravenously through chocolate bars and coffee! Or is it becuase we don't actually age gracefully?

Do we only get to grow old gracefully if we have hair laser removal, incubate a parasite for nine months (no offense) and have some sort of bo-tox or other sythetic toxic substance injected into our face, boobs and/or asses? Not to mention the plethora of "anit-aging" face cream, ass cream, thigh cream and everything else creams that we are meant to be applying to our withering bodies. I mean really...is this what I have to look forward to as I grow old.  I hope not. 

Both my mum and her mother grew old graciously and not to be biased but they aged and are aging pretty dam well.  I can only hope that I have also inherited these genes.  Or else me and some hair laser pseudo doctor are going to become very fast and tight friends....

What I want to know is do men also experience things like this?  I mean we all know about sagging balls and man-boobs thanks to the Bro (Seinfeld) and other sources but is there more to it that we don't hear about?  I want to know and so do many other women out there. 

I am aware and so is the world about erectile dysfunction and incontinuity thanks to depends and pfizer.  I mean where would the world be without drugs for enabling the male libidio at the age of 70?  But do men really worry about getting older as much as women do?  Do you see your body start to fall apart and hope others don't notice as well?  I hope so not because I think men should share our pain of aging but because then we would know that we are all on the same playing field.

Food For Thought 

"Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart."  ~Caryn Leschen

Men & Women Can Be & Are Friends

I never even asked this questioned that men and women can’t be friends or had it asked of me until a few years ago. Actually it was more of a statement “men and women can’t be friends” than a question at that time. It was followed by “there is always an ulterior motive”. I call Bullshite. I think and know men and women can be and are friends.

It is a total misconception that our genders can’t be friends without some ulterior motive or reason like uh I don’t know, sex. Men and women can be friends without wanting to jump each other person’s bones. I can only speak for myself and a few of my friends but honestly friendship is the number one reason behind these relationships not sex or the hope of a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship.

I think people who don’t think men and women can be friends miss out on some pretty amazing friendships. I mean when did friendships between the genders get so complicated? When we were kids I don’t ever remember choosing only girls as friends. We didn’t because we were still innocent and accepting of all people despite our differences such as gender, color or race. Too bad we still don’t see the world and the people in it the same way. Somewhere on the road to adulthood some of us lost the ability to see each other as just people and friends.

I am not arguing that Men and women aren’t different. We are. We see the world and experience things from completely different points of view and places physically, mentally and emotionally. However, this should be the reason why we ARE friends, not why we are NOT. We should embrace friends of the opposite sex to be just that, friends; to dispel stereotypes, to have friends who think differently and who challenge your own ideas. I believe it is to both sex’s benefit to embrace these differences. I think it’s good to know that you can be a good friend, able to celebrate successes such as job promotions and relationships and be there when they need you such as breakups or deaths of loved ones despite their sex. We are influenced by the people in our lives and we should celebrate them despite gender differences.

I know people think girls and guys can’t be friends because of ulterior motives and romantic feelings. I know that romantic feelings do and can occur between friends of opposite genders, but in my experience true friends look beyond your gender, they value you and your friendship over your boobs even if this sometimes takes a while to happen. I am not saying people aren’t attracted at times to their friends of the opposite sex; we wouldn’t be human if we weren’t at some point. We are friends with people because we like and respect them, because they are good people, they make us laugh and we enjoy their company. I believe that we are attracted to the same qualities in our friends as we are in our “mate”. But that doesn’t mean we view every friend as a potential mate.

I have always had guy friends. In fact one of my oldest and best friends is a guy. He has provided me through the years with practical and insightful advice not to mention abundant laughter with his story telling. He lets me ask him stupid questions, mainly about men. In fact he was my life line during high school and university many times over. Why? He understands guys, unlike my girlfriends, because he is one. Plus I like him, he is a good person who makes me laugh and whom I like spending time with. He is honest and will tell me if he thinks the guys in my life are jackasses or nice or if I am being a jackass. Though I have to admit I don’t always listen but he is and always has been there for me. I feel my life is and has been enriched by 20 year our friendship. I hope he feels the same way. If not it’s too late because I know where he lives, where his parents live, his email address and his phone number! True friendship is just that friendship, and we choose our friends for who they are not what gender they are.

Food For Thought

"What is a friend? I will tell you...it is someone with whom you dare to be yourself." ~ Frank Crane