Flat tire blues

Can I just say that there are days when I really dislike my singleness (if that's a word) today was one of those days.  Last night I had a meeting at 7:30 so when I got to my truck in the pitch darkness and attempted to drive out of the drive way I didn't get very far why? Well because I had a big old flat tire!  It was too dark to do anything about it and thankfully one of my roommates kindly lent me her car or I would have missed the meeting.  So this morning that's what I didn't look forward to taking care of...the flat tire.  Now I should mention though I am actually embarrassed to say but I have never changed a flat tire.  I like to drive my vehicle and leave the mechanics including tires to others perferably those that know what they are doing.  This is one of the reasons that I sometimes envy couples I mean you always have someone to convince or at least try to convince into doing the things you hate dealing with such as flat tires.  So this morning in the cold and wind there I was trying to literally pry my spare flat tire from underneath my truck.  Pry?  Yes pry. It became very apparent that after having not been moved, touched or even looked at after about 10 years my spare tire was completely flat and almost impossible to get to because all the nuts, bolts, hooks and whatever's that hold it in place had rusted....in place.  It took me the better part of an hour and tons of WD40 to pry that sucker loose all while trying to convince 4 dogs that I didn't want to play, or throw balls, and attempting to stop them from playing and flinging dirt in my direction from what I personally believe is a big pile of pee ridden bark mulch/dirt.  This was a day when I really questioned why did I and that mechanic I dated years ago break up?  Why would I do that when he clearly provided multiple services other than in the bedroom?  I mean I know why and and don't regret it but today was one of those days when I really questioned my judgement and started to think maybe arranged marriages where the way to go? One of my requirements would obviously be "must be able and willing to change flat tires and other car things". 

I am not trying to be a big whiner here though I think I am doing a pretty good job.  I mean I am a strong independent women who can take care of herself, earn money, pay for food and clothes but whom also likes someone else in my life to take care of the shite I hate doing such as changing flat tires.  Thankfully I made it to the tire place with just filling my tire with air and not having to attempt to actually change the tire because those lug nuts were looking very ominous!  I was lucky to arrive at the garage in a lull and actually to quote myself said "I had a very flat tire this morning and I just want it fixed."  I didn't even ask how much and personally by this time didn't care. It could have cost $200 and I would have paid it because I just wanted it taken care of. And even better they didn't charge me.  Sweet!  So I guess lesson learned on changing flat tires, keeping the spare filled and auto-parts oiled and greased because had that happened anywhere other than our drive way I would have been seriously screwed...and calling a tow-truck may have been in order.   I think my parents would be glad that I experienced a new life lesson and added some more character building to my character.  All it did for me was realize again how much I hate dealing with everything single thing on my own.  So there coupledom singletown isn't always rosy posy.  

Food For Thought
I may be a living legend, but that sure don't help when I've got to change a flat tire. ~ Roy Orbison

Another trip to coupledom

OK  I know I tend to rant on about the single versus couple thing but really some days it just pisses me off....so bear with me.  My latest adventure - traveling.  Myself and two friends are trying to book a trip to New Orleans over the "holiday season" to 1) avoid another pathetic holiday season spent with married siblings, parents and 2) avoid those pitiful looks from people at social gatherings commenting about how sad it is that you aren't spending the holidays with a loved one blab blab.  Whatever!  At least I will be spending it with people I like and not drinking myself into oblivion to avoid those "cheerful" family forced dinners.

We are three single professional gals who are independent and after spending almost every Christ-mass that's right I said Christ-mass you now the mass celebration where you spend most of the time thinking at least to yourself Christ how did I survive this last year?  Well the three of us have decided to venture out and actually spend it how we want to...enjoying copious amounts of food and liquor as per usual however, this year it will be with people we choose and whom we like and in a fun and exciting place, where I don't have to dress in my thermal underwear just to get to the car. 

So in my research to find us a decent place to stay in New Orleans I have come across a rather disturbing yet not too shocking discovery.  The plight of the singleton or singletons to find a decent hotel that doesn't cost me an ovary or first born child.  

I don't know what goes down there in Louisiana but it is really hard to find a decent hotel room for two or more people (friends) who do not wish to engage in close quarter sleeping arrangements in other words sex.  In Canada it seems rather easy to get a hotel room with 2 Queen beds, however in my search I have come across a plethora of rooms with either the choice of A meaning 1 King and/or  1 Queen bed, romantic and family vacation packages and even a "rock star" room.  What I have had a hard time finding is a room for us singles that isn't outrageously priced or forcing me to share a bed with a friend.  Something I find rather ironic in a country and state that doesn't recognize same sex marriages or unions! 

What I find incredibly frustrating is that my friends and I whom had decided on the reality of 2 adjoining rooms because of space and bathroom reasons are getting shafted.  And not in a good way.  It is almost impossible to find a decent room with 2 beds or a suite for 3 adults and guess what for that extra bed(s) not person(s) but the bed the rate is a lot more.  Like hundreds more! Depending on your length of stay! Which I think is incredibly insane I mean its like you pay more for being single and/or not wanting to sleep literally or figuratively with your friend(s). 

It's just another example of how couples get things for cheaper because they do.  I mean I think it's nuts that myself and my friends have to pay more money to occupy the same space as a "couple".  

That being said one of my friends seems to have found us a nice option a hotel with a suite that will probably work for us... though one of us will most likely be sleeping on a sofa bed because another extra bed adds like $100 a night!  Whatever.  We can handle it!   But I would be a lot happier if society would change its attitudes about singles.  I am getting really tired of living in Coupledom. Sometimes Singletown feels like a bad suburb where we pay extra taxes and get jack for it all while watching Coupledom recieved nice new curbing and safer lights at our expense.  Oh well.....maybe one day people will say "Oh your not single" That's really sad"

Food For Thought

"Being single is pretty good. It’s a nice sense of irresponsibility."~Michael Douglas

Is Single-town being engulfed by Coupledom?

As I get older I feel that being single is like being an endangered species; we are dwindling by the day. Every time I turn around another friend or acquaintance is leaving Single-town for Coupledom, which is great and I am happy for them. However, I sometimes feel like Single-town is being engulfed by Coupledom, a place where everyone is happily coupled off engaging in and not necessarily producing offspring but at least practicing, buying houses and erasing all traces of Single-town from their memories. This is couples, is a PROBLEM especially for your single friends. Why? Because you no longer understand or try to understand our lives anymore and you ask stupid and quite frankly if the truth be told hurtful questions at times like: don’t you want to be married? I have actually had friends tell me how they are so happy they are no longer single, like it’s the black plague of our “modern” society.

First off many couples fail to see that being single is not necessarily a choice for everyone. I know shocking but true. Not all of us choose to sleep alone night after night wondering when our next great organism will occur...will it be next week, next year or five years from now? Ok let’s be honest here many of Single-towners would happily settle for good or even adequate sex. Some of us are still single because as we aged we also acquired standards and they get higher the older we get. We do not want to settle in either our sex lives or relationships.What’s more the older I get the more I see Coupledom as a somewhat looming battlefield that I am not sure I want to propel myself onto. It seems to be rife with compromise, age old gender roles, forgetting your life as single entity and making sure plans fit in with the spouse, children and their plans. I am not saying this is a bad thing but from Single-town it’s not really a great reason to join the ranks of Coupledom. However, a sex only relationship doesn’t seem all that appealing either. I mean who is going to do all the stuff I hate doing, like checking my oil. Bed buddies don’t do that – mates however do. Don’t they? Please tell me this isn’t a falsehood.

Trust me people, the more you see couples in your idea of a less than ideal relationship it really makes you question the hurry to be in one yourself. And the biggest reason why we are still single is.... because we just haven’t found the right person or they haven’t found us yet.

What I want to know is why do couples forget what it’s like to be single, to forge through the crap to the gold? Why do they not have single friends to introduce other single friends too? Or if they do, why don’t they? Why do they not understand that you don’t want to constantly be the third, fifth or 7^th wheel at dinners and other social occasions? Don’t get me wrong I like my friends, their spouses and my couple friends but sometimes I wish they would understand and remember what is was like when they where single and except that I don’t want to attend events where I will be the only one single person at the event. It gets old! Single people hate answering the same questions again and again: married? Boyfriend? Girlfriend? And then the conversation dries up like an old prune and you get the sad old maid look. Men is there a sad old bachelor look I am unaware of? If so please let me know. Basically you feel like you should have a sign on your forehead: single please give wide berth (black plague here). It’s not a pretty experience people and TRUST ME your single friends have experienced this A LOT and most likely at one of your events like a dinner, wedding or both. We are just too polite to say your great Aunt so and so thinks I am a looser because I am still single so if you want me I’ll be at the bar getting cosy with my friend Merlot.

I have always enjoyed my life in Single-town. I have traveled a lot, taken jobs all over the world and pretty much done whatever I wanted to when I wanted to. It’s not as if I have never been in a relationship, never yearned to know that I have “found the one” and can stop looking because looking is exhausting people EXHAUSTING. It’s a world full of internet dating, unwanted sexual propositions, no sexual propositions, married folks posing as singles and many other land mines. However, there is a part of me that still hopes that one day I will go bravely forward into Coupledom, to see and experience being a couple from the greener side of the grass leaving Single-town but not single me behind. For now I go bravely forward happily in Single-town a land slowly but surely being encroached by Coupledom.

Food for Thought

"I'm single because I was born that way." - Mae West